Today was a difficult day for me, from the time I awakend until now; it’s been a tough day. I struggled to get through my work day, with so much on my mind; life, relationships, my career, my children, finances and the list goes on . . . I felt like running away. I just didn’t want to “adult” today. So, as I sat at my desk, in what felt like internal misery; I counted down to 2:00. I had already made up in my mind that I needed a little me time, a good laugh and bad snacks.
I stopped at the dollar tree, grabbed a few bad snacks. Anyone that knows me, knows I’m a health nut; Non-GMO, organic, blah blah blah. Any-who, M&Ms and sour patch kids in hand, I headed to to see Girls Trip. I’d heard rave reviews, so I was excited to see it and especially laugh; it was definitely needed. I stopped by the concession stands, if I was not going to “adult” today, I was going all out. GMO non vegan buttery popcorn, boy oh boy was it smelling delightful and a big ass cherry slushy . . . that’s all that was on my mind. “That’ll be $14.75”, – Says the clerk . . . “For what?” – I responded . . . I was not about to pay $9 for a small GMO popcorn. Girl bye, I got Non-GMO kernels at the house (in my head) . . . “Girl, I’ll just take a slushy”. . . To my surprise they had a new flavor, why not, strawberry lemonade mixed with a side of cherry, I was in “I’m not adulting today” heaven. Bad snacks in hand, I headed over to theater 6, to my delight I got the perfect middle seat. My personal me time had begun.
“Hahahaha” – laughter filled the theater “Girl you’re a fool if you stay with him” “Whoop that home-wrecker ass” “You don’t need him” . . .
As I listened to all the conversations around me, I couldn’t help but think:
Do most women see a little of themselves in Ryan . . . Are most of us afraid to be alone . . . Do we stay longer than we should . . . Does our ability to forgive so easily notion acceptance . . . When is it time to give-up and walk away . . . When does talking about the same thing, over and over again, expecting a different result; become insanity . . . When does comfort become indulging . . .When does contentment turn into familiarity . . . When does staying silent pretending not to give a damn heal your “hidden” pain . . . When do excuses become normalcy . . . When does I’m sorry no longer have meaning . . . When does a day of happiness gives hope shortly after, disappointment . . . When does a million reasons to leave become the same reasons you stay?
All along but I’m not lonely ~ Sabrina Claudio (Confidently lost): More like, not alone but I’m lonely. Is this what women of such status (Women like Ryan) go through?! Is status that important; so much so that we endure . . . Pain and loneliness?! “I’m married but behind closed doors my relationship is worthless”, “I’m married but he cheats, but at least I know about it”, “I’m married but at least I got a man” . . . Is this what marriage is about, acceptance of someone’s bs to appease the masses?!
Are most women that are successfully in their careers willing to accept a mediocre mate, simply for a “status”?!
Are you that girlfriend who’s a Ryan?
Sincerely, Mika 💋